Man Arrested for Believing ‘30s Are the New 20s’—Busted for Denying Reality

“I don’t have to deal with real life, I’m still young at heart!” says defendant

MUMBAI—In a shocking case of extreme adulting avoidance, 34-year-old Ramesh Kumar was arrested yesterday after publicly insisting that "30s are the new 20s," a claim he used to dodge all adult responsibilities. Authorities say Kumar had been on the run from grown-up duties for years, living a life devoid of accountability, commitment, and sensible bedtimes.

The incident occurred when Kumar, while dodging calls from his landlord and a text from his boss about missing a deadline, was spotted at a bar, loudly declaring that he "still had time to figure things out" over a Long Island Iced Tea (LIIT). Eyewitnesses say he was heard saying, “I’ve got at least 10 more years before I have to start, like… adulting for real, right?”

Dodging Adulting: A Lifestyle Choice

Kumar allegedly refused to pay his utility bills, change his bedsheets regularly, or commit to basic meal planning. “He told me ‘meal prepping is for the over-40 crowd,’” said his concerned roommate, Arjun. “Meanwhile, the guy’s been living on Maggi noodles and cereal for weeks.”

Kumar's friends revealed they were the real victims of his anti-adulting philosophy. “He literally told me ‘30s are like the 20s with more credit card debt and hangovers.’ That’s when I knew something was seriously wrong,” added Rohit Sharma.

A Reluctant Adult

Authorities arrested Kumar after he reportedly ran away in the middle of an office meeting, declaring that the manager was “killing his buzz.” The arresting officer, Sub-Inspector Ashok Patil, noted, “He claimed that adult responsibilities could wait, that life was all about ‘exploring yourself’ in your 30s. Unfortunately, we don’t allow that level of denial to roam free in society.”

“He’s been using the ‘30s are the new 20s’ line to get out of everything,” added Priya Mehta, his friend. “He even skipped my kid’s birthday party because my son called him ‘uncle.’ He told me he couldn’t handle ‘being called uncle at this stage of life’ and bailed at the last minute.”

Avoiding Responsibility Has Consequences

Dr. Vandana Singh, a psychologist specializing in adult avoidance syndrome, explains that Kumar’s case is not isolated. “There’s a growing epidemic of 30-somethings delaying adulthood, hiding behind phrases like ‘finding themselves’ or ‘living in the moment.’ But really, they’re just avoiding paying their credit card bills and pretending they can still party like it’s 2009.”

Kumar has been sentenced to a mandatory crash course in “How to Be a Grown-Up,” where he’ll be taught essential life skills like setting a budget, doing his taxes, and understanding why watching Netflix in bed all day is not a career path.

Before being taken away, Kumar was defiant. “I’m still young at heart! I’ll adult when I’m 40 or something. It’s called ‘staying in the moment,’ guys!” he yelled, trying to run away but pulling a hamstring in the process.